Oh, it’s that time of the month again. No-not that, but the other one 😉
The time where I feel the need/urge to revisit this sacred and taboo (err..for me, at least) topic. The time when this subject matter suddenly dropped inside my brain and leaves it stain, at least for a whole week. Luckily it happens once in one month or else it might disrupt my daily routine 😉
I have been having these weird + strange dreams recently. Of people that once entered my life and people that I’ve not even missed. Yet they do appear in my dreams. What’s the sign for eh? Troubling me a little. I mean, it come to a point where I feel like my heart cheated my brain by telling the otherwise. Naaah, I think I know both my heart and brain. They work just fine, I can tell.
I don’t missed them and I don’t even think about them, Just so happen that they visited me in my dreams. No biggie, I guess.
I had an intense conversation with a much senior colleague this morning. She said that I reminded her of her youngerself. Vivacious yet fierce and headstrong (yes, she did mentioned headstrong a few times). Then ntah macamana she asked what type of man that I look for. I said, nothing in particular, but the person would have to know how to control me. I also mentioned I had prior engagement with a few guys that don’t know how to tame me (hehe sorta) so I ended up stepping on their heads all the time (lost respect la).
I might have also mentioned that I might need someone much superior than me, arrogant, ferocious and know how to shut me up (the idea of it seemed fine, but I don’t know about the result) 😉
But she told me the otherwise. She said that I should look out for someone much mellow coz somehow it will tone me down a little. She explained that she was exactly like me and she finally ended up with a loving husband that is a bit slow (err..how to put? placid maybe?calm?) and in turn, she found her solace and comfort in that man (might I add, have 3 children from previous marriage). And her coldstone heart somehow get soften and she learns to obey.
I find it hard to digest but I think I might hold on to her words. She has a point.
On another note, during Hot Air Ballon Fiesta last 2 weeks, my 11-yo cousin dropped this 1-million dollar question on top of my head : Kak Nee, bila nak kahwin? Kitorang tak sabar nak tengok Kak Nee walk down the aisle (ok yang ni I la yang translate sendiri)
As always, I just chortle a little. I never get pressured over these kinda questions – it gives me some kind of satisfaction sometimes. Somehow, giving everybody this kind of long wait kinda gives me a discreet triumph. I mean, bukan ke selalu they say save the best for last? I always think that the longer they have to wait, the more attention I’ll get everytime this topic is being brought up.
I think that’s what I’m trying to do sometimes, if not always (okeh, put aside the VERY fact that I have found zero guy yang memikat hati and I’m not financially stable to tie the knot). Heh.
But this answer from another 12-y.o. cousin really made my day : “Ala, ko nak sangat ke tengok Kak Nee kahwin? Ko ingat nanti Kak Nee dah kahwin ada ke dia nak bawak kita jalan2 macam ni lagi? Beli aiskrim, makan pizza, beli itu, beli ini. Baiklah Kak Nee kahwin lambat sikit, nanti kalau dah ada suami and anak, sure dah tak ingat kitorang lagi..”
The others just nod in agreement (and somehow retracting their 1-million dollar q in their minds). Heh, funny. Thinking that I have a lot of MINION fans and loved by many MINIONS really made my day. I know that even I’m always alone, lonely I’ll never be 🙂